Wednesday, February 27, 2013

The Worst Parts of Deployment

Being over half way through this deployment, I'm pretty well into the swing of things now. It still sucks, but I have become pretty used to waking up to an empty bed and cooking for one. There are still parts of deployment that get to me though. Surprisingly, it's not the obvious things, like going to bed alone, or handling Adalin by myself so much. It's the little things. Here's my list of the worst parts of deployment:

  1. OPSEC: There is so much that my husband can't tell me. For safety, and for my own peace of mind, he is very vague in most of our conversation... "What did you do today babe?" His reply is "Stuff..." about 90% of the time. Every once in a while I'll get a "Gassed up the vehicles..." or "played football." Those things are always nice to hear. I never get "details" though, which I'm usually thankful for (as frustrating as it may be).
  2.  No Call-Backs: There have been so many times that I've missed my husband's messages on Facebook by five minutes or less. We still talk almost every day, but there are times that we'll go a few days without. Communication overall has been great. The worst part about communication is not being able to call him back. There have been times (when Adalin's surgery got moved, doctor's appointments, and just bad days) that I would give my left leg to have a direct line so I could call him and just talk. Nine out of ten times, I talk to him within 24 hours so it really isn't awful. When the calls drop or internet cuts out, he always does his best to make sure I know that he's okay, it was just a technology error.
  3. No Privacy: Where my husband is, he can't have his own internet. There's community computers that he can use, but there are almost always people around. It makes it harder to have heart-to-heart conversations that I miss so dearly.
  4. Small Milestones: Adalin is under a year old, so all of her milestones are happening while my husband is away. Since he left, she has started rolling over, sitting by herself, eating baby food, and crawling. All of these things are things that I would love to have shared with my husband. I did record her first roll, first baby food, and posted pictures and videos of her sitting and crawling. It's just not the same though. I want my husband to experience Adalin crawling to him. We did plan to have her before he left, but sometimes I wish we would have timed it better so he could see all of this. I'm so happy that I have her here though, otherwise I would go crazy.
  5. The Big Stuff: Making major life decisions, like whether to buy a house, or continue renting; to take a trip to Michigan (not so major, but still expensive), or not; and to pay off cars, or put into savings... Any life decision is a decision that should be made together. He always gives input, but it's not the same as having him actually here
I'm so happy to see that February is almost over. We've got another month down, and are another month closer to having our family reunited again. Part of me is surprised by how fast the first half has gone. Yet when I look at how much has happened, it makes me realize how long he really has been gone.

Sometime in the next week I will be posting my results of Fab Ab February, a fitness challenge I took this month. I'm excited about my progress.

God Bless ♥ Vi