Sunday, March 03, 2013

Baby Number Two

You were probably expecting to read that I'm expecting, right? Nope! This is the way I announced Adalin, but that's not the case yet. Sorry for all the minor heart attacks. I couldn't help myself.

This post is about age gaps. I'm really torn about how long to wait between babies. My husband has his heart set on 4 years apart. I'm leaning much closer to 2-3. Here are my pros and cons for each:

Two-Three Years Apart
My brother and I are three years apart, and most of the time I like it. We're close enough to get along (usually), but far enough apart to not be in each other's faces all the time. 

Pros and Benefits:

  • They'll be able to play and interact together at an earlier age
  • I'll be able to get my "hot mom body" back and keep it
  • I'll (probably) be done having kids by the time I'm 21 or 22
  • We can un-baby the house sooner
  • They'll be close enough to have common interests from a relatively young age
  • They'll be in high school together (just for a year), so Adalin will be able to show her little brother/sister the ropes.

Cons and Concerns: 
  • They'll be too close, and constantly stepping on each other's toes
  • Baby #2 will be jealous because Adalin will get to do things (drive, later curfew, date, etc) just two years sooner. 
  • The costs of two kids in college at the same time (we're not 100% sure on how/if we're paying for their college, but that's for another post).
  • Busy sports/extra curricular activities schedule
  • Two babies in diapers if Adalin isn't potty trained
Four Years Apart
Jimmy and his brother are four years apart. They are still pretty close, and Jimmy does have a lot more memories than I do of when his siblings were growing up. 

Pros and Benefits:
  • They will be far enough to not be in each other's business all the time. 
  • Adalin will be potty trained, so only one baby in diapers.
  • Spreading the costs of college, sports, and other major expenses.
  • Adalin will be old enough to help out with a new baby
  • Adalin will be in pre-school when the baby comes, so I would only have one child to take care of during the day/if Jimmy is deployed again.
Cons and Concerns:
  • They'll be too far apart to be interested in each other's lives. I want my kids to be best friends, and usually your best friend isn't four years younger than you.
  • Adalin will be resentful for having been an only child for 4 years, then suddenly having to share everything (I know, a lot of this goes to parenting style. I'm not super concerned about this, but it's possible). 
  • I won't be able to start really working on/maintaining my "hot mom body" until I'm 23 or 24. 
  • They aren't going to have the same toys so that's extra clutter in our already crowded house.

That's the end of my list for now. I would genuinely love to hear input from my followers. I know we've still got a while to make this decision, but it's a big one. 

God Bless ♥ Vi