Monday, June 29, 2015

Getting Closer

I can't believe that we're just three and a half weeks from my due date. These past few days, I've had tons of pelvic pressure, spontaneous contractions, and fatigue. Last Thursday, I was 80% convinced I was going into labor, but the contractions finally let up after a few hours.

It's nearly impossible for me to get comfortable, in any position. Baby boy is low in my hips. If I sit on my birthing ball for more than 10 or 15 minutes, I swear he's going to fall out. Not really, but it certainly feels like it. Getting sleep at night is getting harder and harder. I've been waking up 10-15 times per night, trying to get comfortable.

I'm getting anxious about delivery. The biggest part of me really wants to just go into labor already and bring this sweet boy into the world. I know it's still a bit early (36 weeks 5 days today), but I'm so anxious. With the discomfort I've had this past week, I'll be very surprised if I make it to my due date. Honestly, at this point I'm hoping not to. I will go crazy with this hip pain for three more weeks.

Small parts of me are still wanting him to hang out for a while. At this point, my husband and I have decided that we'll likely be done having more kids after this baby. After a high risk pregnancy with Miss A, and all of the additional testing this pregnancy to ensure that nothing is wrong, it's incredibly stressful. Ignorance is definitely bliss when it comes to pregnancy. While I'm so grateful for the extra care we've received this go around, it has made it hard to sit back and enjoy this pregnancy. There are so many "what if's" that swirl around my head thanks to the doctors' constant "high end of normal" comments. I know that he's safe in my belly, and I'm content keeping him there. Then my hips start hurting again and I'm ready to give him his eviction notice ;)

It is a surreal feeling that he could come at any time in the next month. July is a busy month for our family, between our anniversary on the 1st, and family birthdays every week until August, I know it's likely he'll share his day with someone.

I'm feeling relatively confident about delivering this time. Since I was induced with Miss A, I don't really know what to expect as far as going into labor, what natural contractions will be like, and how long delivery will take. I keep psyching myself out, every time I have a braxton hicks contraction (which is still several times per day), I get all excited. Maybe this is labor?! But it's not, yet.

I'm still wanting a natural birth. No IV meds, no epidural, nothing like that. I want to labor in a tub if the hospital has them ready in time, if not then I'll likely hang out in the shower as much as I can. I plan on moving as much as possible too. Birthing ball, walking, stretching... anything to keep my mind occupied through contractions. I want to do this on my own terms this time.

For the next few weeks, I'll be doing lots of walking and hanging out on the birthing ball. My next appointment isn't for almost two weeks, so we'll see how much progress I make between now and then.

God Bless ♥︎ V